The Pain of Fat

Hello Everyone:

When people ask me, "how do you lose weight?", I have a simple answer: eat less and exercise more. True, but not very helpful. When people ask me as a psychologist, "how do you lose weight?", I expand on the answer. I explain that you need to change the psychological association you have with your eating and physical activity. A heavier person will be conditioned to associate pain to healthy diet and exercise and pleasure to poor eating habits and laziness. They might say things like, "I hate to exercise", or "I love chocolate". Hence, weight loss becomes a futile exercise in will power, frustration, and eventual failure.

On the other hand, when people make their mental associations with healthy eating and exercising towards more positive, the healthier choices become much easier and the weight comes off. For instance, a person associating pleasure with healthy choices might tell themselves: "I have energy when I eat well" or "exercise makes me thin".

So, to begin improving the psychological associations you have with healthy weight loss choices, take a piece of paper and draw a line down the middle. On the top left side, put a title that says, "the pleasure/good things I'll enjoy when I _____ (eat better, exercise more, etc.)". On the right side, put a title that says "the pain/problems that will happen if I don't _____ (eat better, exercise more, etc.). Then create an ever growing list of these polar opposites, study them, visualize them, and make them important themes in your life.

Another helpful suggestion: get some hypnosis. It's a quick and powerful way to quickly change how you'll think and feel about your weight loss journey. In sum, make your weight loss associations healthy, positive, and productive and watch the pounds come off.

Best wishes on your weight loss journey!

Dr. Randy Gilchrist
www.TheWeightLossMindset.com

Keeping It Off

Hello Everyone:

Even though a person may lose some weight, the real challenge comes in keeping it off. This is especially true when the diet and/or exercise program used to lose the weight was someone else's formal plan. Most of the time you won't want to do this no-fun plan rest of your life (i.e., the no-carb Atkins/no blueberry muffins the rest of your life diet plan).

The natural tendency once you've lost the weight is to celebrate! And what is our favorite way to celebrate as people? By pigging out and putting back the weight. In a 2002 Consumer Report study entitled "The Truth About Dieting", 8,000 successful dieters who had kept off their lost weight at least a year revealed that the overwhelming majority of them (81%) created their own personalized diet program. The other 19% of the successes eventually adopted their own healthy, lower weight eating and exercise plan and lifestyle.

So, the first key to losing and keeping the weight off is to 1) research and create an effective personalized diet and exercise plan that you are willing to do, stick with, and incorporate into a permanent lifestyle change.

Other suggestions for keeping the weight off:

2) Be flexible and adjust and adapt over time. What worked at one time may not work later. Continue tracking, adjusting, and refining your maintenance plan with what works. while dropping or modifying what doesn't. Continue to track your efforts and research new ideas.

3) Resist laziness. Remember to keep working hard and to pace yourself. Don't start cutting corners and going back to old ways. You lost the weight because you made some strong choices and sacrifices. Don't allow laziness to ruin your hard work and efforts down the road.

4) Resist pride. Great, you lost some weight. Congratulations. No don't get too cocky. Don't think you're too strong now and allow yourself to be placed in tempting situations that will compromise your success. For instance, don't spend a bunch of time at the grocery store checking out the doughnuts that you"used to" eat. If you're not careful, it won't be a "used to" anymore.

5) Keep tracking your weight, body fat percentage, and looks in the mirror. The numbers don't lie and the mirror doesn't either. Try to not slip, but if you see it starting to happen, nip it in the bud and makes the necessary course corrections ASAP! It's like the old saying goes, "it's better to kill a monster while it's small". You don't want it to grow the size of Godzilla and knock over the buildings you've worked so hard to construct! (That is, your lower weight and better body).

In short, stick with it. Pace and refine yourself and your plan. Don't get lazy, sloppy, or prideful. You can keep it off. It's just a permanent assignment. A healthy, lower weight lifestyle is a permanent lifestyle. To thine own self be true!

Until next time,

Dr. Randy

Fat as Intimacy Avoidance

I know, I know, no one ever wants to be overweight, right? I think that's generally true on the conscious level. However, there are certain subconscious payoffs/enticements for keeping the pounds on. One very common inner reason to stay over weight: it can effectively keep potential intimate relationships away. This seems ever more true today with our current looks-obsessed culture.

Specifically, we often stay heavy to try to minimize the chance of getting involved in a couple relationship, along with all of the potential pitfalls, heartache, and rejection risks that may go along with it. Such heavier individuals often possess traumatic emotional scars from their past and often feeling unlovable. Therefore, the extra pounds can serve to validate how they already feel about themselves.

We generally assume that people who feel bad about their weight, therefore feel sad about themselves. However, sometimes a person feels bad about themselves first, and then they gain the weight afterwards to be consistent with their inner selves. True statement: our outer selves often reveal what is going on in our inner selves.

So, what do you do if you find yourself sabotaging your weight and appearance to stave off potential mates?

1) Ask yourself: if I was my perfect weight, would I really be ready to date right now, or would I find another reason to avoid relationships? If so, why? What am I so afraid of?

2) Next, choose to reject this self-defeating approach and replace it with something productive. Instead of avoiding dating through being heavy, choose to give yourself a voluntary sabbatical from relationships. During this break, devote yourself heavily to learning about healthy relationships: what they are and how you can choose and nurture one. Also, work on your confidence and self-esteem.

To prepare yourself for healthy relationships, I recommend going to a licensed psychotherapist to work through your barriers and insecurities to healthy relationships. I also recommend the following self-help resources:

*The Assertive Woman by Phelps --or-- Your Perfect Right by Alberti. Both of these bookes will train you in assertive communication.

*Tongue Fu by Horn. This is a book on how to respond to criticism through deflating, disarming, and defusing there the other is coming from.

*The 7 Principles for Making Marriage Work by Gottman. This is a book from the world's leader marriage expert on what makes for healthy relationships that last vs. what interactions predict will eventual divorce.

*The Secrets of Successful Relationships by Gray. This is a comprehensive 12 CD audio set with a lot of good info in it and is only available new through www.marsvenus.com.

3) Raise the bar of what you now looking for in a potential healthy partner. May a written list of your wants and needs. Now, commit to yourself and others that you will never settle again on less than a healthy partner and a healthy relationship ever again.

4) Choose and print off a number of profiles of what you now feel are potential "healthy" dating prospects from a respected online dating site. Have your selections reviewed by a wise, trusted friend or family member to confirm or reject the health and potential of your profiles.

5) Continue to elevate your self-esteem, your confidence, and your overall knowledge of healthy relationships during your break. When you feel strong and prepared enough to enter the fray, begin your search. Remember: never settle on less than you want and need. I've never seen a problem in life with someone being too picky in their partner search. The problems I've seen come from lowering the bar and not being picky enough.

I hope you find this information to be helpful.

Dr. Randy

Depression and Weight Gain

Hello Everyone:

Depression is more than just feeling “sad”. It also includes a number of other possible symptoms, including poor eating and sleeping habits, lowered self-esteem, low energy, loss of interest in activities, difficulty concentrating and making decisions, feelings of helplessness or hopelessness, and even suicidal thoughts.

All of these symptoms create extreme emotional upset that can wreak havoc on your weight. Because depression is such a miserable experience, poor eating, laziness, and excessive sleeping often become avenues for temporary relief. Unfortunately, overeating and a lack of bodily movement can add a lot of extra pounds. These self-defeating choices then serve to increase your depression, and so the cycle goes.

The best way to not allow depression to hurt your weight is to proactively and strategically manage your depression better to elevate your mood. Obviously, the better your mood becomes, the easier it is to make better eating, sleeping, and exercise choices. Here are a 3 ideas help you better control and elevate your mood:

1) Seek psychotherapy from a qualified psychotherapist. The therapy approach best shown to minimize depression is “cognitive-behavioral therapy”. To find a helpful therapist, I suggest searching the therapist finders at: www.apa.org and www.aamft.org, and then looking up the therapist websites for more detailed information.

2) Search out and utilize quality self-help materials for depression. I recommend 2 possible workbooks: The Feeling Good Handbook by Burns and Mind Over Mood by Greenberger and Padesky. CD programs that many of my clients have found helpful include How to Love Yourself by Hay and Awaken the Giant Within by Anthony Robbins. Websites with helpful material on depression include: www.psychologytoday.com and www.yapko.com/content/selfhelp/aboutdepression.aspx

3) Consider taking a supplement to minimize the depression from a biological angle. An assessment for antidepressant medication from a psychiatrist is an option. A second is to look into natural supplements such as strategic vitamins, minerals, herbs, and health foods. A good resource natural supplement information is Prescription for Nutritional Healing by Balch.

Depression is more than a risk to your weight. It can be a serious issue needing direct professional intervention. Please consider the ideas above to start. Remember, life is too short to be unhappy, let alone overweight. Think about it.

Best Wishes,

Dr. Randy

Peer Pressure to Stay Overweight

Hello Everyone:

There are many potential hurdles to losing weight: hunger, laziness, emotional eating, procrastination, etc. However, an unexpected challenge often comes in the form of unsupportive peers: family, friends, and even coworkers. Even though these are ordinarily the people you’d expect to support you in your weight loss efforts, the opposite is often the case.

So, why would those who are supposed to be closest to us try to sabotage our diets and keep us heavy? Here are several possible reasons:

1) If you successfully lose weight, that might remind them of their own unsuccessful weight loss efforts. In other words, if you succeed and get thinner, it reminds them that they’ve failed and have continued to fail. However, if they can somehow sabotage your efforts to succeed, they won’t have to feel so bad. When it comes to weight loss, “misery loves miserable company”. If everyone feels unsuccessful together, the shared pain doesn’t feel so bad. Sad, but very common.

2) If you lose weight, your peers might suddenly feel like they need to lose weight as well—which they might not feel ready to try (again). Therefore, if they can somehow persuade you off of your diet, it buys them more time before they have to change their own habits.

3) If you became thinner, this would attract more attention, compliments, and acceptance towards you. This, of course, would mean less attention, compliments, and acceptance for them. Hence, some selfishly might try to limit your success because your gain would mean their loss.

4) You changing your diet and exercise habits might interrupt some of your old peer-bonding activities together that your friends don’t want to lose/cut back on. Often, this involves eating out at high calorie restaurants, having parties with fatty snacks, and spending time in more sedentary activities like hanging out and watching TV and movies.

Does all of this mean that your friends and family don’t want the best for you? Well, that depends. The more selfish, jealous, insecure, and superficial they are, the more of they’ll try to sabotage your healthy eating and exercise habits. Conversely, the more service-oriented, gracious, secure, and principles/values-oriented they are, the more that they will support, celebrate, and emulate your efforts.

If you find that your peers are of the more selfish/insecure variety, you may wish to limit your time around them and/or tactfully encourage them to make the same changes you’re making. If they choose to reject you and isolate you because of your weight loss success, you might be better off spending less time around them anyway. Staying overweight should not be a requirement to maintain a relationship. Think about it! You’re not doing either of you any favors. The price of health is sometimes high, but is always worth it. As the saying goes, if you don’t have your health, you don’t have anything.

Best wishes...

Dr. Randy

**Quality Hypnosis Works!**
www.TheWeightLossMindset.com

Having An Attractive Attitude

HAVING AN ATTRACTIVE ATTITUDE

Is getting down to your ideal weight the most important component to looking good? What about muscle tone, a skin tan, and being fashionable and trendy? Although all of these factors can contribute to a person “looking good”, they’re all just a part of the whole attraction package. There is still a large, key factor remaining in the equation.

My simply point is this: as you are losing weight and working on your looks, work on creating a positive attitude as well. The entire package of looks and attitude go far in attracting a potential life partner (and/or to nourish a present one).

I remember talking to a client of mine in my private practice about this issue of attraction and attitude. He said to me: for every unhappy Brazilian supermodel out there, there’s some guy tired of (making love to) her—although he used a much more colorful term. He further explained that “if she’s angry or depressed she becomes instantly unattractive”. Fair enough. He also said that “no man likes an unhappy woman”. I’m sure this is basically true for women’s attraction to men as well. A positive attitude counts.

Here are 5 ideas to cultivate a more positive attitude:

1) Become aware of your tone of voice, facial expressions, and body language. Practice radiating a more positive, endearing countenance as much as possible. Often, acting the part will help you eventually feel and be the part. If nothing else, this will help others want to be around you more.

2) Remember the rule of thumb: do I present myself in such a way that I would want to be around me? If not, change yourself accordingly. It’s like the Golden Rule from the Bible: do unto others (that is, maintain a positive countenance and attitude) as you would have them do unto you.

3) Learn how to think more positively and challenge old, self-defeating beliefs—including letting go of “emotional baggage”. This may be challenging to do by yourself, so you may wish to seek out a qualified and licensed psychotherapist to assist. In addition, you may wish to look into the following self-help cognitive therapy workbook: Mind Over Mood by Greenberger and Padesky.

4) Learn social skills and build up your relationships with others. As you reach out and connect more, your mood and attitude will naturally improve. A suggested book on the subject: How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie.

5) View happiness and positivity as a choice in your life and a skill you can learn and improve, rather than a personality attribute that some fortunate few are blessed with (and others not).

Finally, remember that improving your attitude takes work just like weight loss, fashion, etc. I leave you with thought by Samuel Goldwyn: “I’m a big believer in luck. The harder I work, the luckier I get”.

Best wishes,

Dr. Randy

The Media’s Role in Making Us Fat

Yes, the media has a role in prompting us to eat large portions of high calorie fatty and sugary foods. These include fast-foods, sugary deserts, fatty meats and dairy, processed foods, and other “nutritional offenders”. So, how is the media doing this and why?

The “how” part is simple: the media bombards most of the western world with endless television commercials, magazine ads, billboards and signs, internet ads, and so on. These ads show delicious-looking foods, along with hungry, ecstatic people eating that food. Included with these ads are often catchy statements and slogans of how wonderful it would be for you to eat these foods. Examples: “you deserve ____”, “mmmmmm, ____”, “follow your taste buds”, etc.

The “why” part is also simple: the companies putting out this advertising do so because they want to sell you a lot of their food products and MAKE A LOT OF MONEY. They don’t care about your health and your weight. They are businesses, not health care establishments.

The results of all of this advertising? We consumers make poor food choices and buy larger proportions than needed. The foods we buy are often the ones with the best marketing, rather than those best for our health, our energy, and our waistlines.

Several suggestions to minimize the effects of food advertising:

1) Plan you meals and snacks ahead of time in writing. Make these choices as healthy as possible. Then, resist buying and eating emotionally outside of your plan.

2) When encountering food ads, focus on the fat, sugar, or calorie levels in the food, versus the ecstatic person eating the food.

3) When encountering food ads, restate their positive slogan with something negative. For example, change “you deserve this” to “I don’t deserve to be fat”.

I wish you health and happiness!

Dr. Randy

Motivational Quotes for Weight Loss

Hello again:

Here are a number of motivational quotes to support and inspire you along your weight loss journey:

"Keys to success... Research your idea, Plan for success, Expect success, & just plain do it! It amazes me how many people skip the last step! Practice being a "doer" and success will follow you every step of the way!" -- Josh S. Hinds

"I will not condemn you for what you did yesterday, If you do it right today." -Sheldon S. Maye
"Destiny is not a matter of chance, it is a matter of choice. It is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved." -- Jeremy Kitson

"If you want your life to be a magnificent story, then begin by realizing that you are the author and everyday you have the opportunity to write a new page" -- Mark Houlahan

"There are 3 things that are certain in life: death, taxes and change. You can't avoid change, it's mandatory, progress however is optional." -- Bill R. Good, Jr.

There comes that mysterious meeting in life when someone acknowledges who we are and what we can be, igniting the circuits of our highest potential" -- Rusty Berkus

"If you have the will to win, you have achieved half your success; if you don't, you have achieved half your failure." -- David Ambrose

"Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could; some blunders and absurdities have crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; you shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense." -Ralph Waldo Emerson

Why? Why Not? Why Not You? Why Not Now? – Aslan

"Many risks fail because they were not taken in time. Too many risks are postponed until unnecessarily elaborate preparations are made. This does not mean that one should say, "Damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead!" That is foolish and self-destructive. . . . But don't sit back waiting for the perfect moment. It almost never comes." -- David Viscott, Risking

"The great French Marshall Lyautey once asked his gardener to plant a tree. The gardener objected that the tree was slow growing and would not reach maturity for 100 years.The Marshall replied, "In that case, there is no time to lose. Plant it this afternoon!" -- John F. Kennedy

"When I hear somebody sigh, "Life is hard," I am always tempted to ask, "Compared to what?" -- Sydney Harris

"The last dejected effort often becomes the winning stroke." -- W.J. Cameron

"If I have the belief that I can do it, I shall surely acquire the capacity to do it even if I may not have it at the beginning." -- Mahatma Gandhi

"A ship in harbour is safe, but that is not what ships are built for." -- William Shedd

"When it is dark enough, you can see the stars." -- Charles A Beard

"All of our dreams can come true -- if we have the courage to pursue them." -- Walt Disney

"Success don't come to you... you go to it." -- Marva Collins

"A great calamity is not to have failed, but to have failed to try. -- Unknown (submitted by Tyler Berry)

"The gift of happiness belongs to those who unwrap it." -- Unknown (submitted by Tyler Berry)

"Come to the edge" the teacher said the students replied "but we are afraid" "Come to the edge" the teacher repeated They came He pushed them They flew" -- Unknown (shared by TennisSkch)

"Learn to give yourself what you wish you could get from somebody else." -- Steven Ouellette

"If you can't do it today what makes you think you will do it tomorrow?" -- Yusuf Tura

"Forget mistakes. Forget failure. Forget everything except what you're going to do now, and do it." -- Will Durant (Shared by Karen Noske)

"The world is made a better place by those who refuse to believe they can't fly." -- Unknown (Shared By Pete Watkins)

"Make your life a mission--not an intermission." – Glasgow

"All things are difficult before they are easy" -- John Morley

"Life is daring adventure, or nothing at all". shared by Eileen McCoy

There is nothing in life that cannot be done. All you have to do is reach far beyond your wildest dreams. And never let go. Birgitte Estelle Rasine, copyright 2000

Don't wait for your ship to com in swim out to it... - author unknown (shared by Joanne)

"Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional" - (Shared by Julia)

There are three types of people in the world. 1. Those who see a problem. 2. Those who are the problem. 3. and those who solve the problem. The first two are a dime dozen. What you have to ascertain is this, which one are you. (Shared by Paul Stanley)

"We cannot discover new oceans unless we have the courage to lose sight of the shore." - Unknown (sent by Jacy)

"It is not the critic who counts, not the one who points out how the strong man stumbled or how the doer of deeds might have don them better. The credit belongs to the man in the arena, whose face is marred with sweat and dust and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; who knows the great enthusiasms and devotions, and spends himself in a worthy cause; who, if he wins, knows the triumph of high achievement; and who, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory or defeat" - 'The Man in the Arena' (above quotes shared by Raymond R. King)

Always remember that you can achieve everything in life that your heart desires as long as you have the courage to pursue all your dreams, goals, and ambitions with all your heart and with all your soul. Because it is you and only you that has the power to change your life! If you don't stand up and take control of your destiny - Who Will????? (shared by Steven Poole)

You may be disappointed if you fail but doomed if you never try. Some people advance through life, while others remain stagnant and only dream of what they can achieve. There is a difference between wanting and having, saying and doing. Don't let those who fear progression keep you down or steal your visions. Act out of your dreams. Everything is real and everything is possible. - Element Skateboards (Shared by Linda)

"Well done" is better than "Well said". - Benjamin Franklin

"Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good we often might win, by fearing to attempt." -- William Shakespeare

"The history of the human race is the history of ordinary people who have overcome their fears and accomplished extraordinary things." -- Brian Tracy

You miss 100% of the shots you don't take - Wayne Gretzky (Shared by Ken L.)

“The longer you wait to decide what you want to do, the more time you’re wasting. It’s up to you to want something so badly that your passion shows through in your actions. Your actions, not your words, will do the shouting for you.” -- Derek Jeter (pro baseball player)

"In one hand I have a dream, and in the other I have an obstacle. Tell me, which one grabs your attention?" -- Henry Parks

"Most people are too busy living life to ever put life in their living..." -- Doug Firebaugh

"It's not how many dreams you have, it's how many you bring to life!" -- Bobby Minor

"The strongest and sweetest song remains to be sung" -- Walt Whitman (Poet)

"One of the greatest discoveries a man makes, one of his great surprises, is to find he can do what he was afraid he couldn't do." -- Henry Ford

"Procrastination is opportunity's assassin." -- Victor Kiam (Businessman, former CEO of Remington Products Company)

"There is the risk you cannot afford to take, and there is the risk you cannot afford not to take." -- Peter Drucker

"When you cannot make up your mind which of two evenly balanced courses of action you should take -- choose the bolder." -- William Joseph Slim

(quote reference source: www.getmotivation.com/favorites.html)

Enjoy,

Dr. Randy

Creating a "Weight Loss Identity"

Hello Everyone:

A main reason why losing weight and keeping it off can be so difficult is because you may have an “overweight identity” that leads you to inadvertently sabotage your weight loss efforts. Your “identity” may be thought of as the total way you’ve defined “who you are”: what you do, how you think and believe, and why. Generally, people end up overweight is because their identity somehow came to include being an overweight person, along with the ways of thinking and acting that preserve and perpetuate it.

How does one end up with an “overweight identity”? Where does it come from? Usually, through early-life conditioning. Perhaps parents role-modeled being overweight. Perhaps they called you names and put you down for your looks. Perhaps you were taught that you weren't good enough or worthy enough to be thin. In any event, you somehow learned that being overweight is “who you are”, leading you to perpetuate it—like it or not. .

The good news is that it’s never too late to modify and recreate your id entity into a healthy “low weight” you. When you do, you’ll find that thinking and acting in the ways thinner people do becomes much easier and more natural. Self-sabotage decreases and even disappears.

3 tips for creating a new lower weight identity:

1) First, write out your old negative beliefs and actions you’ve used to stay overweight, and then think of where they originated. From your parents? Peers? The media? Now, challenge these old habits by writing out detailed evidence against each tendency being valid or useful. Finally, write healthier ways to think and act in contrast to these old self-defeating tendencies. You may need to do some research and learn more what statistics say makes for healthy, thinner people and how they conduct themselves.

2) Second, brainstorm and write out your new “weight loss identity”: how you’ll choose to think and act now in relation to eating, exercise, and your lower weight lifestyle in general. Create a composite sketch of the new, healthier you. Continue to research, brainstorm, and refine your written “weight loss identity”.

3) Third, regularly practice visualizing the new you in sharp detail. Make the new you tangible, identifiable, and clear.

*With practice, continuing to brainstorm, refine, and visualize your new healthier, lower-weight identity will help you to actually possess such an identity and make your weight loss journey a success.

Best wishes,

Dr. Randy

What is the Weight Loss Mindset?

Weight loss ... easy, right?

Statistically, all it takes to lose weight and keep it off is to "eat less and exercise more". It's just a numbers game, right? When the number of calories taken in each day is lower than the number of calories burned off, you'll lose weight. Doing this consistently each day will eventually bring you to your weight loss goal. After reaching your lower weight, maintaining it then becomes a simple matter of matching the number of calories taken in versus burned each day on average.

Unfortunately, successful long-term weight loss is actually much more complicated in real life. In fact, people tend to horrible at actually pulling off this lower calorie lifestyle--especially over the long haul. So, what is the secret formula for making this happen? I actually have an answer: the creation and maintenance of a respectable eating and exercise routine AND the possession of a strong weight loss mindset.

A successful weight loss mindset is an individualistic combination of commitment, motivation, desire, focus, and vision. So, how does one create and feed such a mindset? Here are a few ideas:

1) list the positive benefits/pleasure you'll receive by losing the weight and review this regularly
2) list the negative consequences/pain that will occur if you don't choose to lose the weight
3) research and write out a number of key positive, inspirational quotes/lines that motivate you to do what you need to do; review them regularly and as needed
4) close your eyes and picture yourself commencing successfully through the day with your healthy eating and exercise plan--and enjoying it
5) close your eyes and visualize yourself already at your lower, ideal weight; enjoy your success before it even happens
6) especially helpful: seek out some quality hypnosis for weight loss from a licensed, trained, and experienced psychotherapist--either live or through audio CDs

In short, put yourself in a peak emotional for weight loss. Give yourself the ultimate advantage. The better and more often you do this, the easier your weight loss journey. I promise. I've been there myself.

Best of success, health, and happiness.

Dr. Randy

10 Tips for Eating Smaller Portions

Here are 10 things you can do to successfully eat smaller portions. Research shows that you will generally eat less when you:

1) Drink from tall, skinny glasses (over shorter, fatter glasses)
2) Place food on smaller plates
3) Create meals with less variety (the greater the variety, the bigger the portions)
4) Train yourself to not eat all of the food on your plate (push the plate away with some food remaining)
5) Periodically have someone else dish up your food (a person that supports your diet)
6) Eat slower; chew longer and pause between bites
7) Between bites, take a break and allow your body to notify you when it is naturally full
8) Take smaller bites; place less food on your fork/spoon before you place it in your mouth
9) Switch between eating bites of the healthier foods on your plate before eating the less healthy/more fattening foods
10) Try to give yourself portions no larger than your clenched fist (which equates to the size of your stomach)

Any other tips for eating smaller portions? Please leave them in response to this posting. Happy (healthy) eating!

Dr. Randy

Diet Supplements Don’t Work!

Hello Everyone:

Diet supplements don't work. Here's why: they either don't work at all and/or have horrible side effects that are harmful to your health. The few supplements that may temporarily promote some weight loss do so by trying to:

1) Artificially suppress your appetite--leading to malnutrition and your appetite returning with a vengeange when you stop taking the supplement

2) Try to bind and pass excess food out of your body--which strips your body of vital nutrients and promotes malnutrition

3) Try to forcibly accelerate the body's metabolism to burn calories faster--which creates an unhealthy strain on the heart and even heart attacks

4) Trying to get you to buy entire meal plans of lower calorie foods--leading to high expense and lost pounds returning when a person eventually chooses their own foods again

In short, diet supplements are expensive, ineffective, and unhealthy. The best solution? Create your own diet and exercise program based on moderate exercise that you'll actually maintain longterm + create your own lower-calorie diet with foods that you'll actually eat and stick with. Weight loss--that is, long-term, healthy weight loss--comes from a long-term healthy weight lifestyle, rather than through expensive, unhealthy diet supplements and/or foods that cannot be maintained.

There is no easy, quick fix with weight loss. This is a marathon, not a sprint. However, if you would like assistance to kick-start your weight loss motivation and committment, you might want to check out my comprehensive hypnosis for weight loss program at http://www.theweightlossmindset.com/. Hypnosis for weight loss = good. Diet supplements = bad.

Best wishes,

Dr. Randy

Old Sayings for Losing Weight

Here are 5 old sayings to help with your weight loss (I can't remember the authors):

*If it is to be, it's up to me

*If you think you can or you think you can't, you're right

*Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, but expecting different results

*There is nothing to fear but fear itself

*People are about as happy (and successful) as they choose to be


Until next time...

Dr. Randy

Self-Control and Weight Loss

Hello everyone:

To lose weight, all you have to do is to eat less and exercise more, right? Right. Well, that's easier said than done. One of the critical components of weight loss success is the principle of self-control: exercising willpower with our eating and exercise choices. This is essential, but most of us are pretty bad at it. So, what to do?

In an recent Psychology Today article named "Baby Steps to Grown-Up Control", ideas are given to boost your weight loss journey through strengthening your self control. The main idea is this: self control is like a muscle that becomes stronger with practice and exercise. If you can practice small, consistent demonstrations of self-control through simple tasks, your control will increase. Stronger self-control in general makes for better eating and exercise choices.

Try these exercises to build the mental muscle that can actually help you diet:

-- Think twice before buying something.
-- Focus on eliminating "um"s or other unnecessary words from your speech.
-- Spend a week or two avoiding alcohol.
-- Try brushing your teeth with your less dominant hand.
-- Remind yourself to sit up straight.

A second idea to boost your mental self-control for better weight loss: my comprehensive hypnosis program for weight loss, "The Weight Loss Mindset".

Wishing you strength, will power, and a smaller waistline.

Dr. Randy

The Pressure to Lose Weight

In a recent People Magazine article, Hilary Duff discusses the enormous pressure in Hollywood to lose weight. She expressed that, "I did get skinny...I've felt that pressure like everyone else in my position. When a newspaper comes out that says 'Duff Puff – she must have gained 15 pounds' or something like that, how would any normal person react?"

In Hollywood, actresses are in a constant state of being criticized as too fat ("Duff Puff") or too thin ("Eating Disorder"). Is there any woman in Hollywood that actually is an acceptable weight? It seems not. No wonder eating disorders are so rampant there--and in the rest of the United States!

What does all of this mean for you--and everyone else not in Hollywood? A lot. The pressures of Hollywood are simply exaggerations of the everyday pressures put on all women to be thinner, heavier, or so other "er". One good solution? Look to medical science for what is healthy and ideal.

I suggest calculating your ideal Body Mass Index ("BMI") number to find your true, statistical ideal weight range and make that your target weight range to strive for. Your ideal BMI calculation should be between 22-24.9. When in doubt, trusting in science is a decent way to go. Strive to be medically healthy.

As for the self-proclaimed weight police out there telling everyone they're too ___, I say, who made them the experts? What are their credentials? For the most part, they have none. They're usually not medical doctors, so they should stop acting like it. Even if they happen to be MDs, why would it still be OK to give unsolicited opinions and judgement? Think about it. If weight opinions are unsolicited and critical, they're usually not wanted.

Until next time,

Dr. Randy

Overcoming Emotional Eating

Hello Everyone:

Have you ever found yourself calm your stress through munching on chips? Have you ever drown your sorrows with a big ice cream sundae? Have you ever escaped boredom through chocolate? If so, you are not alone. We've all done this from time to time. However, these situations needs to be a rare, contained events. If "emotional eating" becomes our usual approach to food, we'll soon need to eat more and more to sooth our panic at our expanding waistlines. We're overweight because we feel bad, and then we feel bad because we're overweight. Yes, it can become a vicious cycle.

As I mentioned in my 12/11/06 post, "The Secondary Gains of Poor Eating", one of the common possible incentives for continuing with poor eating habits is for food to serve as an emotional state changer. In other words, when we don't like how we're feeling, as easy (although temporary) way to try to change those feelings is by eating some "comfort food".

So, how do we control emotional eating? Well, the short answer is to find and swap in a better, healthier way to soothe our upset feelings than through food and eating. Food should be for replenishment and refueling purposes only.

So, here are some other ways to soothe and shift your feelings:

1) Learn and practice healthy relaxation techniques, such as deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, visualization, etc. A solid resource for such relaxation is "The Relaxation and Stress Reduction Workbook" by Davis, McKay, and Eshelman (2003). Learn and practice these techniques so that you can go to them as needed when the crisis hits.

2) Beef up your social life. A disconnected, lonely, depressed, and/or angry person is a person at risk for emotional eating. And, nothing puts us at risk for such feelings like our relationships being strained. The primary relationships are, in order of priority: spouse/partner, children, parents/extended family, friends, coworkers/acquaintances, strangers. Initiate contact with these social sources in your life. Repair, nourish, and reconnect with all of the main social relationships in your life, and your emotions will reward you. Call, email, send a card or letter, visit, etc. Apologize regularly. Also, ask for and give forgiveness to others and yourself on a continual basis.

3) Be your own best emotional support system. Be your own best friend. Pamper yourself. Need a break? Take one. Need some better eating, exercise, and sleeping habits? Give yourself these gifts. Need a hobby? Find one and enjoy. Give yourself what you really need in a healthy, balanced way. Remember, if you're not going to treat yourself well, why should anyone else? Furthermore, how or why would you feel good if you don't treat yourself in positive, supportive ways?

There are many other ideas here, but these 3 ideas comprise a healthy start. Enjoy!

Dr. Randy

Internal Reasons to Lose Weight

Why lose weight? Well, some reasons are better than others. External reasons for losing weight involve trying to impress someone else: family, friends, strangers, potential love interests, etc. Is this a good enough motivator to lose weight? Well, usually, no. Not long term, anyway.

People who successfully lose and keep the weight off need consistency. Longevity. Committment. A permenant, low weight lifestyle. External motivation alone usually runs out--especially because some people are impossible to impress, no matter how much weight you might lose. Or, they just plain don't notice. They're often too into themselves.

To keep your improved eating and exercise habits, it eventually requires that you also possess internal motivation to be thin. Internal, meaning--if no one ever saw you thinner, would you still want to lose the weight--just for yourself? Would you still want to sacrifice that cheeseburger? Would you still get out of bed to exercise if no one ever knew either way? If not, it's time to change that.

Here are some ways to increase your internal motivation to lose and keep the weight off:

1) Research the endless health benefits of losing weight (and the terrible health consequences of staying overweight).

2) Try to remember how much better you'll feel inside when you lose weight. Think of all the extra energy, self-esteem, and overall happiness you'll enjoy!

3) Visualize yourself thin and healthy. Enjoy a preview of your better, thinner looks right now.

4) Practice making yourself the main one you want to impress. Be your own audience. Your own crowd to please. It's all about you!

5) Remember--be your own best friend and your own best support system. You are the one that will never let yourself down. In the end, you are the only one that will be there for yourself 100% of the time.

I wish you all of the internal motivation you need, want, and desire! Until next time...

Dr. Randy

Mandatory Fat Talk Among Women?

So, I'm up late and I bump into Saturday Night Live on the TV. Yes, that show is still on. I just watched their "Weekend Update" clip tonight (3/17) reviewing a recent actual study about "fat talk among women". Recent research suggests that when women congregate, they typically engage in an obligatory ritual: they share mutual negative put downs of their weight (and other looks topics). Apparently, this "fat talk" serves the multiple functions of mutual female bonding, as well as reciprocal validation, empathy, and support.

Yes, I understand that women in 2007 are still judged primarily by how they look. However, self put downs about weight? Can't there be a better way to promote female bonding? How about giving each other compliments about each others' looks, with the woman receiving the compliment simply saying "thank you"? Or, even better, how about just focusing on non-looks topics altogether?

How can a woman lose weight when she keeps telling others (and hence, herself), how "fat" she is and/or how ugly her ___ looks? To once again quote an Old Testament verse in the King James Version of the Bible, "For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he" (Proverbs 23:7). I think that that applies to "shes" as well.

Don't set yourself up for a negative self-fulfilling prophesy. It's like playing with fire. For more info on this topic, see my last blog entry, "The Secret: Thinking Thin".

Goodnight all,

Dr. Randy

The Secret: Thinking Thin

Spurred on by support from Oprah, the latest craze in the self-help world is the DVD and Book, "The Secret" by Rhonda Byrne. The essence of The Secret is that thinking positively about what you do want will tune you into the proper frequencies of the energies of the universe to generate the attainment of your goal. Conversely, thinking negatively about what you don't want actually attracts other negative energies to generate the negative result.

The essence of this idea is that our subconscious mind doesn't differentiate between "good" and "bad"--it just generates what we focus on--good or bad. Of course, The Secret is not the first brand of psychology or even religion to promote this idea, just the latest. The Bible states, "as a man thinketh in his heart, so is he’ [Proverbs 23:7].

Therefore, having thoughts like "I'm too fat", "I'm a pig", or "I can't stop eating" won't help motivate you to lose weight. In fact, it will turn into a negative self fulfilling prophesy. However, thinking "I am becoming thin", "I will better and exercise", "I am becoming my ideal weight" sets oneself up for a positive outcome. The same with visualizing yourself--see yourself as your thin ideal before it happens, rather seeing yourself as the overweight person you fear or dread.

In short, see and think about the positive outcome you want now to put yourself in the right direction and you will lead and guide yourself to the positive result. Seeing and thinking about what you don't want will generate the opposite. Simple, but not easy. Well, practice makes perfect. Good luck!

Dr. Randy

My Hypnosis Program for Losing Weight

I know about weight loss—both professionally and personally.

As a licensed clinical psychologist and hypnotherapist, I had a goal to create the absolute best and most comprehensive weight loss program possible—the perfect program that I myself would have loved to have back when I needed to lose my weight.

I actually had 70 pounds to lose a number of years ago. Like most people, I tried many different diet and exercise routines over the years with no success whatsoever. Then, I was fortunate to have one single hypnosis session back in 2001 to lose the weight. My feelings and attitudes about weight loss miraculously improved from that point. 12 months later and 70 pounds lighter, I replaced my obese lifestyle with much healthier choices that I have kept ever since. I learned firsthand how the power of hypnosis can truly create a weight loss mindset and lifestyle. Ever since losing my own weight, and after receiving my own hypnosis training in 2001, I’ve been helping others lose weight with hypnosis in my psychotherapy office.

From that training and experience, I slowly created the most thorough, comprehensive, and effective hypnosis program that I could. The result is my latest program, The Weight Loss Mindset. This program includes much more than I ever had when I was losing my weight. So, feel free to review this site to have any additional questions answered about myself, hypnosis, and weight loss.

Thank you for interest. I wish you immense health and happiness.

Dr. Randy